Maybe #yogaeverydamnday isn't such a great idea. I know I used to think it was. But then after years of needing to practice every day, I realized that I was harboring some negative space around my yoga that I needed to settle. There were days when I practiced twice a day, and the days that I didn't practice at all I was experiencing guilt. Days that I felt like I needed the heated yoga room in order to feel complete. Days where 60 minutes just wasn't enough. The problem is that these feelings are so counterproductive towards what we are trying to accomplish by practicing yoga. I am going to be completely honest here and say that when I made the decision to leave CorePower Yoga, I gained an immense amount of clarity around my purpose in yoga. I realized I had been brainwashed into thinking that practicing every day in 100 degree heat and 30% humidity that I was becoming a better and more well rounded person. What I was doing was taking up so much time in my schedule for a monotonous practice with little to no growth in an environment that felt toxic.
What I have gained by stepping back and listening to what my body really needs, for ME, not for anybody else, is the lesson of slowing down. This has been my greatest lesson so far. The past few years of my life I have been stuck in a pattern… either I'm not doing enough, or I am doing too much. Where is the in-between? Well, I've found that when I feel like I am not doing enough, it's not a sign to start a new business, or change jobs, or switch my schedule, it's about being productive with the time that you are given. Do all of those things on your list that you keep saying you want to do. Read those books that are getting dusty on the shelf, start taking those walks around the lake, write a blog post, or simply catch up on the boring life tasks that we are responsible for as adults (filing paperwork, cleaning, taking the car to get serviced, etc). If the problem is not the above… then take a good long look at your life, and decide to either change what you do, or find a way to love it.
As I'm writing this post, I just stopped and asked myself, "wait, where am I going with this?" Then I remembered. Slowing down. Once I realized that I didn't have to practice every single day, and that I could experience a happy and healthy body without the regimented yoga schedule, then I started really enjoying my life. I chose to dedicate more time to studios that made me happy, started a home practice, and every time I stepped onto my mat, maybe 3x a week, I felt joy and clarity. I FEEL joy and clarity. I'm becoming more aware of what my body is telling me every day, and then I ask myself how I can give it what it's asking for. By slowing down in all ways I can connect to my purpose in a deeper way. I can listen intuitively to all things. I can honestly say I am experiencing freedom.
What I would like to see from all people is the ability to stop, slow down, and listen. Consider what could happen if you chose to live intuitively rather than do what you think you know. It's like Cheryl Deer said today in class, "Fuck alignment, it's great, but start to feel the posture and your body will tell you where to go."
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